Sunday, May 10, 2009


I had a blast on my first mother's day! Dustin gave me a spa package that I am chomping at the bit to go take advantage of...speaking of which, I am going to cut my hair! It's been a long time since it has been above my shoulders but I think summer and the amount of shedding I have been doing lately make it necessary!
I wanted to post a little tribute to each of my 3 moms and then about my experience as a mom so far...My Mom- Misty
I love you mom! You are such an inspiration and watching your strength since Steve's death and us helping each other through some hard times has made me love you and appreciate you even more. Thank you for all you do for us and especially for the wonderful Grandma you are to Ryker. Love you!

Grandma Joyce- Wonderful Woman who Raised me
I don't think words can express how much I love and appreciate you for all that you do and have done for me. You didn't really need to take me in- (she is my step-grandma and when she started raising me, my mom and her son had already divorced-what a saint!)- but you did and I am so glad that I was raised by such a spiritual, wonderful woman.

Dustin's Mom- Cindy
I have had so much fun with you and really love the times that we have together. You're so great to always want to help with Ryker and really have raised your sons to be great men! You are a very strong person and such a fun Grandma.

This picture makes me look fat and just blah- but I had just given birth, so just ignore my flaws.
I have had so many ups and downs of motherhood so far- I will not lie, it is HARD! Good news- it's getting easier, well at least more rewarding. Looking back I really did like him as a newborn but he intimidated me- "why is he crying?!? why won't he sleep?!? why am I sad?!?" All went through my head a million times a day. A mix of him adjusting to the world and wacky hormones caused these feelings...
Now, I look back and really want to have him small for like an hour, just to cuddle. I see him growing WAY too fast and feel like soon he won't need me. He still wants to be held quite a bit and sometimes when I'm in the middle of something I get bugged, but now I realize that he won't always want me to hold him and I better milk it for all it's worth now.
He is such a fun, happy, smart boy and he just gets more fun, happier and smarter everyday. I sometimes miss him when he's taking a nap and today when I got a little break, it made me want to just squeeze the guts out of him when I got home.
Didn't know I would ever feel this way, but I LOVE BEING A MOMMY!

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